Tag Archives: music

and now a word from our sponsors

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I submit the following in toto as evidence of the genius of Tom Waits. Of course, you should really listen to the recording.

Step right up
step right up
step right up
Everyone’s a winner, bargains galore
That’s right, you too can be the proud owner
Of the quality goes in before the name goes on
One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar
we got service after sales
You ’bout perfume? we got perfume
how ’bout an engagement ring?
Something for the little lady
something for the little lady
Something for the little lady, hmm
Three for a dollar
We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale
And a smoke-damaged furniture
you can drive it away today
Act now, act now
and receive as our gift, our gift to you
They come in all colors, one size fits all
No muss, no fuss, no spills
you’re tired of kitchen drudgery
Everything must go
going out of business, going out of business
Going out of business sale
Fifty percent off original retail price
skip the middle man
Don’t settle for less
How do we do it?
how do we do it?
volume, volume, turn up the volume
Now you’ve heard it advertised, don’t hesitate
Don’t be caught with your drawers down
Don’t be caught with your drawers down
You can step right up, step right up

That’s right, it filets, it chops
It dices, slices, never stops
lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
And it mows your lawn
and it picks up the kids from school
It gets rid of unwanted facial hair
it gets rid of embarrassing age spots
It delivers a pizza
and it lengthens, and it strengthens
And it finds that slipper that’s been at large
under the chaise longe for several weeks
And it plays a mean Rhythm Master
It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
And it’s only a dollar, step right up
it’s only a dollar, step right up

‘Cause it forges your signature.
If not completely satisfied
mail back unused portion of product
For complete refund of price of purchase
Step right up
Please allow thirty days for delivery
don’t be fooled by cheap imitations
You can live in it, live in it
laugh in it, love in it, swim in it, sleep in it
Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it
Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets
that’s right
And it entertains visiting relatives
it turns a sandwich into a banquet
Tired of being the life of the party?
Change your shorts, change your life, change your life
Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy
get rid of your wife
And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax
Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack
see you later alligator, see you later alligator
And it steals your car
It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking
It’s a friend, and it’s a companion
And it’s the only product you will ever need
Follow these easy assembly instructions
it never needs ironing
Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff
Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job
it is a job
And it strips the phone company free
take ten for five exchange
And it gives you denture breath
And you know it’s a friend, and it’s a companion
And it gets rid of your traveler’s checks
It’s new, it’s improved, it’s old-fashioned
Well it takes care of business
never needs winding, never needs winding, never needs winding
Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis
Christ, you don’t know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon
‘Cause it’s effective, it’s defective
it creates household odors
It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection
It gives you an erection
It wins the election
Why put up with painful corns any longer?
It’s a redeemable coupon, no obligation
no salesman will visit your home
We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot
prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed
How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it
We need your business, we’re going out of business
We’ll give you the business
Get on the business
end of our going-out-of-business sale
Receive our free brochure, free brochure
Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions
batteries not included
Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available
Step right up, step right up, step right up
You got it buddy: the large print giveth
and the small print taketh away
Step right up
you can step right up
you can step right up
C’mon step right up
(Get away from me kid, you bother me…)
Step right up, step right up, step right up
c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon
Step right up
you can step right up
c’mon and step right up
C’mon and step right up

spam/hippies/lenini/racism

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I looked through the comments on this excuse for a blog, and noticed that spammers have taken to auto-spamming blog entries. For the example on mine, see the entry I want to axé you a question. I guess Radiohead inspires penis growth advertisements. I would delete them, but it is awfully amusing that there are two comments made in December on a post from June. Who is going to read that far back? Me, I guess.

Yesterday afternoon I went to the hippy-feira, a sort of artisan street fair that happens every Sunday in Ipanema. Apparently it used to be real hippies, but now it’s hippies with cellphones and distribution systems. Ram’s sister Lakshmi helped me negotiate some good deals, since the rule there is to haggle, and as I noted before, I should have learned more Portuguese.

Later we went to a free concert on the Copacabana beach — the first act was Maria Rita, and she was three shades of enh. The second act was Lenini, which makes one thing of some sort of opera guy, but in fact was more rockin’ out. Hard to place him in terms of American music, but he veered near Blues Traveler, Spacehog, and RHCP at times. Not too close, but in a nebulous middle ground between the three. The metropolitan bus systems in Brazil are cooler than the US. There’s a second guy who sits in the bus and gives change (within reason), so the driver doesn’t have to be responsible for fare collection as well. Much smarter than in Boston, where they used to get pissed off at you for not having exact change all the time.

So my inability to detect racism in Brazil was explained by Ram, who said that discrimination here is based on economic grounds, and less on skin color. But there is a correlation between the two. Some of the complexities of 19th century race are exemplified by the author Machado de Assis. Thanks to Dan Good for introducing me to him. The hosting site of that previous link is pretty cool in its own right. The Library of Latin America series has a wide range of information about 19th century Brazil, from history to literature to essays and commentary. All of Machado de Assis’s novels have a very informative essay at the front to put the novel in context. Well worth reading!

punchy

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Punch Drunk Love is a fabulous movie. It manages to have enough of the surreality of real life that I just sat there last night goggling at it, and not even noticing the time. Of course, it is a short movie, but I think it’s compactness makes it even better. It manages to be so economical with the material. Bene.

I’m going to sing “La Bataille De Marignan” in a concert this afternoon, and then work on martingales for much of the evening. I dont know why I find this so amusing. It’s not even decent wordplay, they just share a few letters. Kind of like “collodion” and “colloquium.” Though a colloquium on collodion would be pretty funny. “Advances in stage imitation of scar tissue: the collodion collision and its corollaries.”

So good

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Of course, I’ve already said how fantastic the Gotan Project is. Makes me feel I should be sweating in Buenos Aires in front of my typewriter, cigarette burning in the ashtray, feverishly writing my manifesto… only I don’t smoke. And I’ve never been to Buenos Aires.

Descubrimos vos y yo
en el triste carnaval
una musica brutal
melodias de dolor
Despertamos vos y yo
y en el lento divagar
una musica brutal
encendio nuestra pasion
Dame tu calor
bebete mi amor

(scammed off of GeekRoar)

In other news, Idi Amin just died. I feel this is a good thing, but I don’t like myself for being glad of a death. I guess because I have a hard time saying that anyone “deserves” to die. Maybe I’m just too much of an idealist.

I want to axé you a question…

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Leo McKern is an awesome actor, and he’s looked the same for his entire life it seems. I mean, he played Gloucester in Laurence Olivier’s King Lear, was the villain in Help!, and (my favorite) played Rumpole in Rumpole of the Bailey. The only thing that seems to have changed is his hair, but from 1967 to 1997 he looked the same. It’s a pity he passed away last summer.

I’m going to see a concert of axé music, which is contemporary Brazilian music from Bahia. It’s part of the Stern Grove festival, which is free concerts through the summer. I read up on it a little today — after all, you’re supposed to learn something new every day.

Just picked up Hail To The Thief today, and I’m not passing judgement on it until I listen to it 2-3 more times. I have to make the decision between “really good” and “damn good.”

Go go gotan!

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The Gotan Project are some crazy tango/dub artists who are completely rocking my auditory system. My roommate got their new album, and I am listening to it for the second time today. I’m just going to have to go buy it, there’s no doubt about it. Maybe I’ll force Kristin to listen to it later (there, now you have something to search for). Apparently “gotan” is Buenos Aires slang for “tango.” It just makes me want to go to Argentina.